Do You Love Your Boobs?

If the problem is that Mr Gravity has given your boobs a hammering or having children just seems to have sucked the life out of them, there are some things that you can do to improve the situation. If you’re over 30 it’s highly unlikely that you’ll get back the upwardly pointing perky globes that you had in your late teens but you can try some exercises to stop them hitting your knees 10 years down the line. 

Here’s a question for you: do you love your boobs? If your answer is no, you’re not alone. It’s a sad fact of life that, except for a few short years, our boobs are rarely where we want them to be and sadder still that they are seldom the size or shape that we would wish for. It’s  a bit like Goldilocks and the 3 bears; ‘they’re too big!’ we cry or ‘they’re too small!’ How many of us say ‘they’re just right’? To be honest, how many of us would dare to say that we are perfectly happy with our boobs for fear of getting dagger stares from other women?

Saggy boobsIf the problem is that Mr Gravity has given your boobs a hammering or having children just seems to have sucked the life out of them, there are some things that you can do to improve the situation. If you’re over 30 it’s highly unlikely that you’ll get back the upwardly pointing perky globes that you had in your late teens but you can try some exercises to stop them hitting your knees 10 years down the line.

Essentially our boobs are just sacks of fat and the heavier they are, the more Mr Gravity will try to drag them downwards. If we are overweight, losing a few pounds will certainly help in that department but we also need to strengthen the muscles in our chest to give us back an element of lift. If you don’t fancy going to the gym, swimming is an absolutely excellent boobercise and you’re not limited to the breast stroke either as crawl and butterfly are also going to really work those pecs!

If you don’t fancy that , here are some other exercises that you can do to help you be perky and proud:

Benchpress
Chest press (or bench press) is a great pecs exercise and you can do it with free weights or on machine

Chest fly with weights and wide armed press-ups will also really get those chest muscles working!

Don’t forget, as our boobs contain ligaments which will stretch over time it’s best that we don’t let them go flying about all over the place so it’s important, especially when running, that we invest in a great fitting and supportive sports bra.

There is nothing worse for our silhouette than an ill fitting bra (or if you’re boobs are heading south, no bra at all). Little tiny scraps of silk and lace with little spaghetti straps may look pretty but they’re  not going to keep anything in place if you’re larger than a B cup so speak to someone who knows what they are talking about and have a proper fitting and invest in something that’s best for your shape. (Despite what he might say to the contrary, Dave, the local butcher, is not the ideal person to advise you on underwear!)

Bad bra

This picture brilliantly illustrates the difference that a well fitting bra can make. The boobs are in the right place, there’s no spilling out under the armpits and the straps don’t look like they are trying to cut through the poor woman’s shoulders. Yes it might cost a little more to find your perfect bra but, come on, don’t your boobs deserve it?

If you’re thinking ‘if all else fails I could have a boob lift’ then, yes, that is an option but

  • Consider whether or not you want to have your nipples cut off and then stuck back on somewhere else because, apparently, it’s difficult to sort out the sagging without it
  • Even if you have implants, that will make no difference to Mr Gravity so, over time, your boobs will still sag.
  • As with any surgery, there are risks so have a good think about that before going under the knife

So, there are things we can do to fight the sag but, at the end of the day, we are who we are and we should love ourselves – boobs and all ;O)

Lisa x

 

Do You Want the Perfect Face?

Don’t ever smile or laugh, in fact keep your face as still as possible – too many facial movements will give you wrinkles

Yes? OK here’s what you need to do; just 10 simple steps that will keep your face looking young and beautiful for years to come……..

  1. Don’t ever go out into the sun – it will ruin your complexion
  2. Don’t ever smile or laugh, in fact keep your face as still as possible – too many facial movements will give you wrinkles
  3. Drink nothing but water maybe with a little added lemon juice on special occasions
  4. Make sure that you get 8 hours of sleep every night
  5. Have a facial at least once a week and make sure you take off every last scrap of make-up before you go to bed at night
  6. Wash your face in ice water last thing at night and first thing in the morning
  7. Use eye cream, cleansers, toners, moisturisers, face packs, eye masks and lip creams
  8. Never eat sugar, junk food, processed food, street food, high fat food, dairy, caffeine, shellfish, bread, pastries…….just eat salad and vegetables basically.
  9. Always make sure that you have your personal make-up artist with you at all times
  10. Make sure that a photograph of you is never published without it having been photoshoped

Alternatively, you can forget all that crap and just smile, laugh and enjoy life – it’s too short to do anything else ;O) xx

 

It’s Gone All Baggy!

However, the sagging skin on the body, for me at least, came as a bit of a shock; it doesn’t look like an elephant’s backside just yet but it has certainly drawn my attention and made me question the wisdom of being in downward facing dog in front of other people.

There I was, quietly minding my own business in downward facing dog pose, when I noticed something strange; the skin on my arms appeared to be slipping. Up until this point I’d never really wondered what is was that kept my skin attached to the rest of me but I’d always kind of assumed that, whatever it was, it wouldn’t just stop working.

downward facing dog
This is not me as you can see from the firm, non-sliding skin

Obviously, everyone knows about wrinkles, the lines around the eyes and mouth that appear as we get older and we all know that there is plethora of treatments that women are quite happy to pay billions of $ for each year. However, the sagging skin on the body, for me at least, came as a bit of a shock; it doesn’t look like an elephant’s backside just yet but it has certainly drawn my attention and made me question the wisdom of being in downward facing dog in front of other people.

The baggy skin issue occurs because, as we get older our bodies produce less collagen and elastin which are basically our natural ‘plumpers’. So, what can we do about it? Well, fortunately there are things that we can add to our diet that will promote collagen production:

Look for foods containing Omega 3 such as oily fish (mackerel, tuna, salmon etc), green vegetables (kale, spinach, broccoli), walnuts, flaxseeds and chia seeds as these will encourage your body to form more collagen.

papaya-mango-ananasAlso seek out foods that are rich in vitamins A and C as both are required by the little biological factories that we call our bodies to increase collagen output. Orange vegetables such as carrots and sweet potatoes are high in vitamin A and look to fruit to up your vitamin C intake, especially papaya, mango and pineapple (yum! what a delicious combination!).

In addition it’s worth looking at dietary supplements; it’s possible to buy marine collagen, omega 3 and more vitamins than you can shake a stick at in capsule form. I have found that natural supplements do work; I recently ran out of vitamin C and have noticed that, since I stopped taking it, the elephant’s arse skin seems to be making more of a come back!

bingo wing exercisesThe other thing that stimulates collagen production is exercise and the right types of exercise will build muscle in the areas that seem to suffer most from baggy skin syndrome: upper arms and tops of the thighs. Well-defined muscles will give shape where you need it most and will detract from aging skin.

If you want to keep your skin looking as youthful as possible then make sure that you keep properly hydrated (consider the difference between a plum and a prune and you’ll see why). Everyone knows that water is extremely beneficial to our health and that applies even more as we get older.

The last thing to consider are the creams, lotions and potions that are marketed as ‘miracle cures’ for sagging and aging skin but do they work? All of the products that I’ve tried (and there have been many) certainly made my skin feel a little softer but none of them addressed the baggy issue if I’m honest so I’ve gone back to using coconut oil which has much the same effect and is considerably cheaper.

However, as an aside I have recently discovered a combination of oils which have worked wonders with the skin on my face. As we get older, not only do we have the baggy skin problem, it also seems that our pores want to get in on the act and go from being shy, retiring and practically invisible to showing off and forcing themselves centre stage.

If you want to slap them back down try pure Argan Oil (which is non greasy and easily absorbed) with a couple of drops of Neroli oil (which promotes skin regeneration and improves elasticity). I’ve started using this morning and night and have really noticed a difference! Every couple of days I also swap the Neroli oil for Rosehip oil at night as this really seems to help hydrate my skin when it’s feeling dry and itchy.

There you have it – my recommendations for keeping elephant’s arse skin at bay for as long as possible :O) x

 

Oooh That Hurt!

I think that really all we can say is f**k it! Aging is inevitable and there is nothing that we can do about the passing of the years. Our bodies will change and we can fight that or accept it. Personally, in the writing of this piece, I’ve decided that I’m even more determined to continue doing those things that make me feel younger

Have you ever read something and immediately thought ‘oh!’, then felt a tightness in your throat and an unbearable urge to cry even though you know that you’re being silly and over-sensitive?

I felt that this morning when I was browsing through Twitter (why oh why do I keep doing that!) and came across this Tweet:

“I love how this powder foundation evens out my skin tone without being too heavy,” said the woman who blasphemes nature daily by underhandedly modifying the tone of her complexion and luster of her hair with an array of ointments, gels, and lotions shrewdly designed to impart an artificial bloom of youth to her aging, depleted body

It’s taken from an article in the Onion which satirizes new stories; I think it’s meant to be funny but, as with most satire, it’s inherently cruel.

Ever since I read it I’ve been trying to work out why it bothered me so much and I’ve come to 2 conclusions:

  1. It made me feel slightly pathetic; is everything I’m doing to keep my body looking and feeling younger just laughable self-delusion and a refusal to accept the inevitable?
  2. My youth is behind me and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it.

Old women quotes

Then the real negativity started…..am I turning into a laughing stock? A raddled old hag who’s trying to pretend that she’s still young? Researching attitudes didn’t help much either; the quote above is from a Pulitzer prize winning dickhead (it didn’t actually say that in his bio – I added that bit) and it made me wonder how many other men think like that. Are men genetically programmed to only lust after young, fertile women for  the continuance of the species or is it just that we all appreciate beauty, men and women both?

toilet-paper-ad.jpgWe are a consumer society and virtually everything that is marketed to us is done so by young lovelies with perfect bodies and beautiful smiles – cosmetics, clothes, breakfast cereals and even toilet paper (yes apparently we even need beautiful women to sell us the stuff that we wipe our backsides with!). Beauty, it seems, is inextricably linked with youth so where does that leave the rest of us who are the wrong side of 50 and feeling sorry for ourselves this morning (that could just be me to be fair).

I think that really all we can say is f**k it! Aging is inevitable and there is nothing that we can do about the passing of the years. Our bodies will change and we can fight that or accept it. Personally, in the writing of this piece, I’ve decided that I’m even more determined to continue doing those things that make me feel younger and that includes looking after my aging, depleted body so that I’ll still be able to hop of the back of a motorbike and hurtle round the mountains even when I’m 90. I might look like an old woman trying to recapture her youth but, quite frankly my dears, I don’t give a damn.

 

Unleash Your Inner Kid

We had dreams, wonderful dreams, yet over time, we lose them or we push them to the back of our minds because we are persuaded or we choose to believe that they are not possible. Anything is possible!

 

“Just imagine becoming the way you used to be as a very young child, before you understood the meaning of any word, before opinions took over your mind. The real you is loving, joyful, and free. The real you is just like a flower, just like the wind, just like the ocean, just like the sun”   Don Miguel Ruiz

As we get older we start to think more about the meaning of life and why we are here; we try to find a reason for our existence, maybe because we reach a point where we realise that we are not going to go on forever. When you are a child your happiness is more or less effortless; you might cry when you scrape your knee or when you want a sweetie but Mum says no but that’s pretty much the sum total of your stress and worries otherwise you go through life in joyous abandon. Do you remember that? The energy and excitement you felt running towards the swings with your friends and then the freedom you felt when you were swinging as high as you possibly could? There was a little bit of fear because it felt like you could be flung off into the sky at any moment but there was also the excitement of feeling like you could fly! As adults, especially as we get on in years, we forget that that kind of exuberance is possible and we weigh ourselves down with more fears and more worries but why?

Fundamentally our existence is based on what we have experienced in the past and, from this, we then imagine what we may experience in the future. If we perceive our experiences as negative then our imagination of all future experiences will be tainted by that negativity. For instance, if you try a new sport and sustain some sort of injury, you will have a small association with that sport and pain but, if you think more and more of the pain and remember the sport whilst you are thinking about the pain then chances are that’s the end of that sport for you! However, if you remember the fun you were having before you got hurt, you’ll likely brush off the pain and have another go. You then might find that you love the sport and it will become a great part of your life and bring you real happiness; the situation hasn’t changed – you played sport and got hurt – but your perception of it has.

Our mental attitudes shape our lives and some people manage to retain the absolute freedom and happiness that we all had as children because they don’t analyse every situation they find themselves in and they don’t analyse the people that they spend time with. How much time do you spend thinking about what you do before you do it? Do you try to imagine other people’s reactions to what you want to do? All this time that is spent considering possible outcomes could be spent just actually enjoying yourself – in effect you will create time for the things that you enjoy if you stop thinking and just do.

This video sums up absolutely beautifully why it’s so important for us to remember what life was like when we were children.

We had dreams, wonderful dreams, yet over time, we lose them or we push them to the back of our minds because we are persuaded or we choose to believe that they are not possible. Anything is possible!

If you are in your 50’s or 60’s then all of the people shown here are older than you and they all have a few things in common – they don’t think that they have to stop doing what they love just because they’re getting older, they don’t worry about what other people think about them and they haven’t forgotten what it’s like to feel like a child and just take pleasure from what life offers us.

Quite simply, life is short and we never know what tomorrow will bring or even if we will have a tomorrow so why not make the absolute best of what you have today?

Ps. Yes that is me in the picture and yes I was the only adult riding the merry go round – it was great fun :O)